While hundreds of thousands of protesters voiced their anti-Trump dissent in Washington, I decided to spend my inauguration weekend serving in a domestic violence center. Below is my reason why.
In 2013, Trump essentially kicked off his presidential campaign by tweeting that military sexual assault should basically be expected because men and women serve in the military together. This fall, Matt Lauer gave Trump an opportunity to restate his comments in a forum hosted by NBC, but Trump did not. “Well, it is a correct tweet,” he said.
More infamous was his tirade against Fox News’ Megyn Kelly, who he said had “blood coming out of her wherever“ after she questioned Trump for having demeaned women as “fat pigs” and “dogs.”
Remember his assault on Fiorina? In an interview with Rolling Stone magazine, he said: “Look at that face!” “Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?!”
Moreover, in an interview on MSNBC, Trump said “there has to be some form of punishment” for abortion if it were to ever be banned in the United States — and that punishment should fall on women.
In December, Trump mocked Clinton for being a few minutes late returning to the stage during a Democratic debate saying, “I know where she went, it’s disgusting, I don’t want to talk about it.”
And, after Clinton challenged Trump on his history of criticizing women’s looks and bodies, focusing on the specific example of Alicia Machado, a former Miss Universe who says Trump called her “Miss Piggy” (after she gained some weight) and “Miss Housekeeping” (because she is Latina), Trump defended fat shaming Machado, telling “Fox and Friends” that “she was the worst we ever had.” “She was a winner, and she gained a massive amount of weight, and we had a real problem,” he said. “We had a real problem with her.”
There is also the Robert Ailes crimes. The former CEO of Fox News, was accused by many women of sexual harassment, including former news host Gretchen Carlson (with whom Fox News recently settled). But Trump defended Ailes, telling “Meet the Press“: “I can tell you that some of the women that are complaining, I know how much he’s helped them.”
Frighteningly, this is merely a sampling of Trump’s most perverted attacks on the inherent self worth of women. There is also the rape allegations, sexual harassment allegations, and sick rumors of exploits with women paid for sexual favors in Russian hotels. If for no other reason than common decency, I can not accept this man as a legitimate office holder. He is not my president. He is not my representative. He is not someone who I will support.
As domestic violence writer Lundy Bancroft wrote: “An abuser can seem emotionally needy. You can get caught in a trap of catering to him, trying to fill a bottomless pit. But he’s not so much needy as entitled, so no matter how much you give him, it will never be enough. He will just keep coming up with more demands because he believes his needs are your responsibility, until you feel drained down to nothing.”
Bancroft stated elsewhere: “The abusive man’s high entitlement leads him to have unfair and unreasonable expectations, so that the relationship revolves around his demands. His attitude is: “You owe me.” For each ounce he gives, he wants a pound in return. He wants his partner to devote herself fully to catering to him, even if it means that her own needs—or her children’s—get neglected. You can pour all your energy into keeping your partner content, but if he has this mind-set, he’ll never be satisfied for long. And he will keep feeling that you are controlling him, because he doesn’t believe that you should set any limits on his conduct or insist that he meet his responsibilities.”
On January 20, 2016, the people did not elect a true president. What we collectively witnessed-like bystanders to a crime- was one of the largest and most public acts of domestic violence ever recorded. Trump’s taking the oath was an act of domestic violence. He is an abuser. His words are abusive. His actions are abusive. His policies are abusive. His history is abusive. His spirit is abusive.
God help us all.
Where, as a nation founded on civil rights and human dignity, will we seek an Order of Protection against this man?
I benefited immensely from the article below by Catherine Pearson, Women & Parents Senior Reporter, The Huffington Post